• Home
  • Military Discounts
    • Military & Veteran Discount List
    • Local Military and Veterans Discounts
    • Apple Military Discount
    • Veteran & Military Cell Phone Discounts
    • Gym and Health Club Discounts
  • Benefits
    • 10 Veterans Benefits You May Not Know About
    • Top Military Spouse Benefits
    • Medal of Honor: Benefits, History and Facts
    • Purple Heart Benefits
    • Veterans Health A to Z
  • Housing & Home Ownership
    • VA Loan Calculator
    • VA Loan Limits by County
    • VA Home Loan Guide
    • 5 Benefits of a VA Loan
    • 2022 BAH Rates
    • BAH Calculator
  • Money & Finance
    • 2022 Military Pay Charts
    • 2022 Defense Budget
    • 2022 Military Pay
    • COLA Watch 2022-2023
    • Military Pay Calculator
    • Military Pay Dates
    • VA Disability Rates
  • Jobs
    • Veteran Friendly Employers
    • Military Spouse Employment Preference
    • Veterans Employment and Training Service (VETS)
    • Security Clearance Jobs After the Military
  • Education
    • Veteran Friendly Colleges
    • Online Colleges with Military Discounts
    • Veteran Friendly Colleges Guide
    • Military Spouse Career Advancement Accounts (MyCAA)
    • Monthly Housing Allowance (MHA) for the GI Bill
    • Forever GI Bill
  • Resources
    • How to Get a Veterans ID Card
    • Veterans ID on Driver’s License or ID Card by State
    • Military ID Cards
    • Military Calendar
    • State Veteran’s Benefits
Home » Advice for New Military Spouses

Advice for New Military Spouses

by MilitaryBenefits

Joining the military community can be a daunting and foreign experience for individuals unfamiliar with the military life. You are not alone – and you certainly don’t have to navigate this strange new world on your own either. For new military families, the military jargon, customs and courtesies, high OPTEMPO (“operational tempo”), and the myriad of bureaucratic organizations to deal with can be incredibly overwhelming. Never be afraid to ask questions. There are so many experienced families who can guide and support you along the way. Here is some helpful advice that I routinely share with new members of our military community.

Photo by Petty Officer 2nd Class George Degener
Photo by Petty Officer 2nd Class George Degener
  • “Nothing is EVER set in stone!”: This is a motto that I live and swear by from my experience as both a Soldier and as a spouse. This motto has made my life infinitely easier when I know and accept ahead of time that dates and situations will always change because the military works in time frames, not set days, making life unpredictable for military families.  Having worked on operational level staffs, I’ve seen the hard work and planning that our service members’ leaders conduct on a daily basis. I’ve also seen the immense frustration when all the in-depth planning is nixed or drastically altered, requiring immediate attention in addressing the latest issue or timeline change at hand. There’s always someone higher up in the food chain with the authority to alter any given plan. In a perfect world, everything would be predictable and on a set schedule. However, as a new spouse, get used to arrivals, departures, training events, and even vacation leave moving either right or left on your calendar. The same goes for abrupt requirements that will require your service member to have to drop everything and disappear at a moment’s notice for a tasking or for a last-minute change in duties.
  • Use your family support group: Each service has its own support group with different names, but they all serve the same purpose in providing information, guidance, access to military post resources, and camaraderie. Their functions are most prominent during times of deployment and extended training when your service member is away from home, but they also serve the same purpose in a garrison environment. The Army has its Family Readiness Groups; Navy has its Ombudsman volunteer and Family Readiness Groups; Air Force has the Key Spouse Program; Marine Corps has the Family Readiness Program; and the Coast Guard has the Work-Life Program. Get to know the other senior spouses – they are a wealth of knowledge and experience and can guide you through the often baffling military system. Check with your readiness groups and on-post facilities to see if they offer introductory classes for new spouses. There are often courses both in a classroom or online that you can participate in to familiarize yourself with ranks, military jargon, military benefits and resources, and deployment preparation.
  • Ask questions in the absence of information: The most damaging thing that can harm a unit and its families is misinformation. In the absence of real information, never succumb to rumors and never make assumptions. If something sounds off or if you lack clarity, ask your Family Readiness Group Leader or the Chain of Command (if they have provided their contact information for that very purpose). Always go to an individual or representative who is authorized or has direct access to get the real information. Circulating or purely going off information within a rumor mill is counterproductive to the efforts of readiness groups and units which have the best intentions for the families under their care.
  • USAJOBS.GOV: Moving from post to post every couple of years can mean your own career sometimes takes a backseat. At USAJOBS  you can find federal jobs around your current duty station, as it is an incredible resource to becoming a federal employee. The Military Spouse Appointing Authority (Executive Order 13473) gives agencies the authority to hire military spouses without competition, but it doesn’t entitle spouses to a hiring opportunity over all other applicants. For more information, read “Special Hiring Authorities for Military Spouses and Family Members.”
  • Understand the Leave and Earning Statement (LES): Upon first glance, the LES can be highly confusing with all of its acronyms. Learning how to decipher what everything means will ensure you can track pay allowances, benefits, debts, and allocated leave days. Consistent monitoring of the monthly LES can prevent pay issues.
  • Memorize your sponsor’s (service member’s) Social Security Number (SSN) and birthday: Commit this information to memory, as all Tricare benefits and any other official military services will always need the sponsor’s information before services are rendered. Just ensure you give this information out judiciously to legitimate organizations and trusted sources to prevent identity theft.
  • Familiarize yourself with your respective service’s customs and courtesies, as well as personal etiquette: There is nothing more embarrassing than committing a social faux pas at a military event, be it a formal, semi-formal, or casual event. No one ever wants to go down in unit history as that person. Ensure that you also dress appropriately for unit functions – when in doubt, ask an experienced spouse or the leadership for clearer guidance on attire. (Most event invitations will specify the dress code.) If you’re invited to a small function, a Thank You letter to the host/hostess will go a long way.

As a whole, welcome to the military community! It’s a fantastic adventure that your family will never forget. A grateful nation thanks you for your commitment and sacrifices. Get ready to meet amazing people, see different places, and HAVE FUN!


About The AuthorViv is a West Point graduate, an Army Officer, an Army wife, and a Family Readiness Group Leader. She has served on Active Duty with deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan and is now in the Army Reserves. She is enjoying life in Texas with her Army Ranger husband.


Related Articles
PCS (Permanent Change of Station) Packing Tips PCS Tips For Military Families
Benefits of Families Living on a Military Base Military Family Benefits
Sesame Street for Military Families Free App 5 Top Military Spouse Benefits
Advice for New Military Spouses Tips for Sending Care Packages to the Military Overseas
10 Great Military Base Perks 5 Ways It’s Great to Be a Military Spouse!

Filed Under: Benefits

Comments

Military + Veteran Discounts

Want 30+ Mil/Vet discounts to use today? Enter your email for updates and we'll send it!
Name(Required)

VA Home Loans

Popular Articles

2022 VA Disability Rates

2022 Military Pay

Military Pay Calculator

VA Loan Calculator

2022 BAH Rates

Search Veteran.com

Military Benefits Logo

Company

  • About
  • Contact Us
  • Add a Discount
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of Use
  • Disclosure
  • Unsubscribe

Quick Links

  • Home
  • Military Discounts
  • Benefits
  • Housing & Ownership
  • Money & Finance
  • Employment
  • Education
  • Resources

Connect With Us

  • facebook
  • instagram
  • pinterest
  • twitter
  • youtube
Copyright © 2022 Three Creeks Media, LLC

Veteran.com is a property of Three Creeks Media. Neither Veteran.com nor Three Creeks Media are associated with or endorsed by the U.S. Departments of Defense or Veterans Affairs. The content on Veteran.com is produced by Three Creeks Media, its partners, affiliates and contractors, any opinions or statements on Veteran.com should not be attributed to the Dept. of Veterans Affairs , the Dept. of Defense or any governmental entity. If you have questions about Veteran programs offered through or by the Dept. of Veterans Affairs, please visit their website at va.gov. The content offered on Veteran.com is for general informational purposes only and may not be relevant to any consumer’s specific situation, this content should not be construed as legal or financial advice. If you have questions of a specific nature consider consulting a financial professional, accountant or attorney to discuss. References to third-party products, rates and offers may change without notice.

Advertising Notice: Veteran.com and Three Creeks Media, its parent and affiliate companies, may receive compensation through advertising placements on Veteran.com; For any rankings or lists on this site, Veteran.com may receive compensation from the companies being ranked and this compensation may affect how, where and in what order products and companies appear in the rankings and lists. If a ranking or list has a company noted to be a “partner” the indicated company is a corporate affiliate of Veteran.com. No tables, rankings or lists are fully comprehensive and do not include all companies or available products.

Editorial Disclosure: Editorial content on Veteran.com may include opinions. Any opinions are those of the author alone, and not those of an advertiser to the site nor of Veteran.com.